The End!

Well, New Orleans was our last stop before making it all the way back round to Florida, where we started last April.  As I type this, I'm sitting in the blazing sunshine of the Florida Keys (Key Largo to be exact).  We've been here for about a week and have been snorkeling and kayaking through the mangroves, which has been nice.

But before anyone starts sending me hatemail, we also have an unimaginable amount of boring, practical stuff to sort out.  We're working on getting the RV ready to sell and trying to figure out the logistics of how we're going to make everything happen at the right time to ensure we get it sold before heading home, but without leaving us prematurely homeless!  Our current prevailing plan is to sell it at the end of this month and move into some kind of vacation rental (yep, an actual house / apartment without wheels!) for the remainder of our time out here.

When we've figured all that out, there's the small matter of what the hell we're going to do with our lives when we return home!  So basically the plan is to deal with all the logistical stuff as quickly as possible, then find somewhere to settle and chill for whatever time we have left, have some more fun and plan for the future.

We still have quite a while left of our trip and we have a few places in Florida that we're going to try and visit, like the Everglades and Miami, but we may not have time to write blog posts on those places with everything else that will be going on, so I guess we'll wrap the blog up here!

Here's how our completed route looks, taken straight from GPS.  Absolutely mental, basically.  If you squint, it looks like some kind of demented duck/giraffe hybrid.

We covered 25000 miles and visited 32 states in the US, 5 provinces of Canada and 1 Mexican state.  We expected to do 20000 miles, so there's 5000 miles of wrong turns, driving aimlessly around looking for camping opportunities and who knows what else in there somewhere!

It's been an adventure from start to finish, a rollercoaster of challenge and reward.  We feel like we've learned a lot by making it happen, proud that we've accomplished it together and infinitely privileged to have seen some of the best bits of an entire continent on this huge planet of ours.

We're also happy that so many people took an interest in following our travels on this blog.  When we started it, the main purpose was to keep a record of our journey to look back on in the future and ensure we didn't forget anything.  We had no idea so many people would be keeping tabs on our antics and looking forward to hearing what we got up to next.  A few people have even said we've inspired them to do something similar, which is even better!

No doubt it will be traumatizing when the time finally comes to head home - I mean, how hard is that final morning of a holiday, when you have to head to the airport and the hangover you've been immune to all week finally kicks in because reality has started drilling its way into your skull again!  I guess we need to be prepared for that, multiplied by about 50.

But we also have plenty to look forward to when we come home, including planning a wedding!  Other than that, here's my top 5 things:

1. Seeing friends and family again
2. Proper bacon
3. Proper beer
4. Mildly annoying people by shoe-horning the phrase "when we were in America" into every other sentence, and/or saying the occasional word in a broad American accent
5. Not having to listen to country music any more

Thank you all again for reading and sharing this experience with us, it's truly been a blast!

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New Orleans, Louisiana

As we headed towards New Orleans we hit some really cold weather.  At one point the front of the RV actually had a sheet of ice above the windscreen as the rain froze on contact.  This was quite a contrast to the weather we had had only a few weeks ago in beautiful Mexico.  In fact I think it was the first rain we'd seen in about 6 weeks!

We had managed to secure two nights in a prime RV park which was very convenient for the French Quarter of New Orleans.  The French Quarter is a popular and very touristy area of the city, with beautiful old buildings and ornate architecture.

We wrapped up warm and headed out early evening onto the icy cold, but surprisingly lively streets.  So many shops, galleries, bars and restaurants to choose from!  With hungry bellies we searched out a nice looking restaurant.  Busy is always a good sign in my experience, but the theory didn't quite hold up on this occasion!

There were only a few free tables left and the front of house led us only a few steps inside the doorway, to a table in quite close proximity to a guy that was sitting on his own.  I sat closest to him with my back to him.  We ordered some drinks; their special cocktail of the day, an interesting warm cinnamon spiced rum – that certainly warmed me up!

We ordered from a set menu – starters and mains, including a couple of versions of Gumbo, a New Orleans signature dish.  The guy behind us had started coughing a little.  He seemed a popular fellow with the all the staff and we overheard several members of staff greet him like a long lost friend.

He started to cough a little more and someone brought him a drink and gave him some free food.  Unfortunately by the time my main meal arrived, he was coughing his guts up and the sound of all his snotty phlegm being sucked up and down his throat was enough to paralyze me whilst I dry heaved into my napkin with watery eyes.

Wow, that was a meal out never to be forgotten for all the wrong reasons.  I knew we had made a mistake when we passed up on dining in another restaurant that came highly recommended on TripAdvisor as a “must-do”.

For one reason or another we had had a pretty shitty day, and the whole gagging experience was just the icing on the cake!  We left the restaurant, took a few photos and headed back to the RV park to chill in the hot tub.  Tomorrow would be a better day!

We woke to a chilly but sunny clear day and headed out to explore the city and take a walk along the Mississippi river.  First things first, yes you guessed it, more food was required!   It was heading towards lunch time, and I had scoped out another Man Vs. Food venue.

"Mother’s" is a café primarily serving "Po-Boys", a generously-filled Louisiana variety of sandwich served on French bread and dipped in gravy.  Adam had their signature dish, a meat filled Po-Boy with ham and beef, and I ordered a chicken salad.  The chicken salad had no less than a full lettuce at the bottom, and a mountain of tender grilled chicken breast on top.

After I had been eating for about 10 minutes, my plate was only just starting to look like it had a normal portion on it!  But we battled on valiantly, and finished the lot like the conscientious hard working people we are.

Next we walked on to the Garden District, New Orleans' historic neighbourhood. Originally this area was a plantation that was divided into lots and sold.  It was developed in the mid 1800s, offering luxurious homes and gardens to the rising mercantile elite.  It's reminiscent of the King William Historic District we had visited days before in San Antonio and quite a contrast to the stacked townhouses of the French Quarter.

Anybody watch "American Horror Story - Coven"?  We walked past the house who's frontage is portrayed as the witches' house.  These houses are just stunning!  The Lafayette Cemetery was also reminiscent of the graveyard scenes in the programme too.

We had walked our little legs off by the time we got back to the French Quarter, so obviously the only way to ease that is with a drink!  We hit a lively bar around 4pm with happy hour deals going on, everyone in there from age 18-70 seemed to be downing beers and shots and singing with the DJ.  We soon got into the spirit of things after getting chatting to a girl in her early 20’s who had just got a job going round the bar all night and selling shots (and being allowed to get pissed whilst she did it).  She was obviously good at her job because 10 minutes later we were buying overpriced bright blue test tubes off her, that weren’t even the volume of a 25ml regular shot. 

Later we staggered off towards the upmarket and recommended Court Of Two Sisters restaurant that we had regrettably taken a pass on the previous evening.  The food and service was awesome, and they had a gorgeous open fire which suited me just fine!

After our fabulous meal we hit the bars again, drawn in by the talented live bands in several venues.  There wasn't really much authentic southern soul being sung.  They were mainly singing well-known classic upbeat songs (Bon Jovi, Journey, etc).  I love the fact that there was no admission price on the door and you could wander from venue to venue and enjoy all their music!  I was certainly in the party mood and probably had a few too many drinks….that’s just what happens when you give me shots at 5pm!

We had planned to see some more of the city the following day, but unfortunately my head wasn't in the mood!  New Orleans is the kind of place where you can spend all day wandering different streets and avenues, fascinated by the unique houses and shops, then stay out all night afterwards and party your ass off - even on a Thursday night!  I can only begin to imagine what it’s like for the Mardi Gras!  Awesome :)

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Rodeo at Fort Worth, Texas

To the Stockyards Rodeo – yeeee-haaaaa!!  Fort Worth is the 16th largest city in the USA and the 5th largest in Texas.   It is situated just to the west of Dallas but it felt like we had arrived in another galaxy, not just another state, when we rolled into the Stockyards!  We soon realized we had made a great error in forgetting to pack our cowboy boots, hats, spurs and horses; which were pretty much standard attire for all in this part of town.  We were just about the only people wearing trainers / casual wear…oh well, dare to be different.

We arrived on a Saturday afternoon, and started by battling our way through a 20 minute traffic jam to get to the RV-friendly parking area, trying to avoid the already merry cowboys and gals, horses in the street, bikers and the like.

Our first encounter with a true Texan was a cantankerous, deaf, old cowboy in the parking lot who insisted on hobbling over on his two sticks “to help”.  By the time he arrived three minutes later, we already had directions from his pleasant wife.  He could neither hear nor understand a word I was saying – which was simply “We're all sorted, thanks anyway”, which he took massive, unnecessary offense to and started waving his stick and loudly stating how rude I was!  Adam assures me I was not the rude one, not on this occasion anyway!

As we exited the RV, the faint smell of BBQ smokehouse wafted into our nostrils.  We had been left with a hankering for more great pulled pork, brisket and ribs after a fabulous meal the day before at The Salt Lick.  We spied the source of the enticing smell at the other end of the parking lot, and somehow we drifted to the door, Adam with a slightly delirious drooly grin on his face for the second time in two days.  It’s all about the BBQ with him!  We ended up with a massive tray of meat, the equivalent of half my body weight in pork ribs, sausage, juicy brisket…. Mmmmm -  we so need one of these in MK!

We wandered onto the main street taking in the sights and sounds you might expect to see in a Western movie, including horse shit on the pavements - watch your step!  We're fairly convinced the entire town is sponsored by Wrangler or something - OTT blingy cowgirl outfits are definitely the in thing in these parts, sparkly embossed denim and hats, cowboy boots of all colours, tassels, big hair, and lots of leather.

I've never seen so many bow-legged guys in one spot, I could have make a killing on the orthotic knee brace front!  The main crowds and horses seemed to be gathering around the watering hole, which also happened to serve that thing that goes well with BBQ – BEER!

We stepped inside a busy bar and went back in time 50 years.  It was fab, a live band playing western music, couples dancing, rounds of shots being downed, cowboy hats lined the walls and ceiling, oh and the overwhelming smell of stale smoke (smoking is still allowed in bars in Texas).  We happily spent a few hours there - the people watching was fascinating.  They even had the saloon style swing doors into the toilets, which got more fun as the afternoon went on :)

We had booked our tickets for the evening rodeo which started at 7pm.  We headed there early to try and get some good seats near the front and secured second row seats at the best end with all the best action, more by luck than judgement.

The show got off to an exciting start with the cowboy contenders mounting the bulls in the stalls before being released to buck off their unwelcome riders.  Now let me tell you, these animals are powerful beasts with ridiculously massive horns.  They look as if they enjoy and relish the opportunity to throw someone around and release some energy but you wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of one!  It was so nerve wracking to watch.  I was literally on the edge of my seat, as were many others, with my heart beating out of my chest each time a rider fell.  They had to stay mounted for a minimum of 8 seconds to gain any points, which proved to be an impossible task for every contestant.

Once unseated, the Rodeo Clown has the fun job of trying to drawing the buckaroos away from the fallen cowboy.  Pretty brave for a clown!  Occasionally the cowboys had to run for safety and clamber up the side walls of the arena out of the danger zone.

I realise the idea of a rodeo is probably a controversial one.  Some people are opposed to any method of using animals for sport / entertainment in this way.  Others are OK with it as long as certain humane measures are imposed on the event.  All I can say is that, in the case of the adult bulls and horses at least, they seem to enjoy the challenge.  I know it's impossible to say that conclusively, but they're very well trained and as soon as they realise the rider has been ejected, they seem to settle and head straight for the exit of the arena (occasionally with some chaperoning if they're right over the other side).  You can also see right behind the gates where they stand prior to being released and there's no evidence of any inhumane methods (electric cattle prods, etc) being used to rile them up. 

Next up was the calf lassoing contest.  This also required great skill, agility and speed to capture and tie up a calf under time pressure.   If they had not successfully lassoed the calf within 2-3 seconds of its dispatch, they were set up to fail the task completely.  Very exciting stuff.  If anything, this was an event we weren't too sure about on an ethical basis, as it's hard to imagine that the young calves understand why they're being lassoed and tied up.  Again though, they seem to trundle quite happily towards the exit when their moment to shine has finished.

Later came the cowgirls' turn - a timed horse riding competition in which they appeared galloping full speed out of the stalls, then had to dodge around three bollards without knocking them over, then back across the finish line into the stalls.  The leading times for this were just 14-16 seconds – truly amazing!

I think the most shocking entertainment of the evening was actually when they called all the children from the stadium (all ages from tiny 3-4 year olds up to about age 12) into the ring, without their parents, and released a pretty big calf with a sticker on its back.  The winner would be the child who retrieved the sticker!  Only in Texas?! But all in all a great evening out and thoroughly recommended.  

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The Salt Lick, Driftwood, Texas

We were northbound, heading towards Dallas and Fort Worth for the rodeo.  But first, a compulsory stop-off in the sparsely populated and unassuming area of Driftwood, Texas.  Why?  Well, we've been pretty slack on our tour of the ridiculous "Man Vs Food" style eateries all in all, but this was the location of one we were definitely not going to miss - "The Salt Lick".

This place is basically the ultimate BBQ restaurant.  Their main offerings are slow-cooked beef brisket, huge smoked jalapeno sausages, ribs and chicken / turkey.  They cook everything over a massive fire pit, fed by live oak wood and pecan hulls for optimum heat and flavour.

We had to queue for a while when we first walked in (it was only a mid-week lunchtime but seemed like half the town was there!), so we got to stand near the pit and see the chefs do their thing.  Hyponotised from the second we got in there, I had a vague sensation of my head swinging like a pendulum as my dilated pupils followed the movement of the giant "mop" being used to continually baste the meat on the grill.

When the waitress finally came to lead us to our seats, I think Sharon was expecting to have to click her fingers in front of my face to get me back in the room!

Sharon went for the combo plate of brisket and ribs and I plumped (pun intended!) for the all-you-can-eat option.  You have three options with the brisket:  "Lean", "moist" (little bit of fat) and "burnt ends" (the seared crust plus some of the tender inner meat).  We both went for the burnt ends and definitely made the right choice - phenomenal!

Sharon polished hers off fairly quickly and I was pretty satisfied after two plates of brisket, ribs, sausage, potato, bread, coleslaw and beans (well it was only lunchtime and I had a three hour drive ahead of me!).

A couple of potential home DIY projects have come to mind during this trip.  For a while I've been thinking of building a hot tub in the garden, having enjoyed relaxing in several of them at RV resorts across the USA.  Now I'm thinking if I'm going to dig a hole in the garden, it's going to be a fire pit.  Should make summer BBQs round ours quite interesting!

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San Antonio, Texas

San Antonio was our first planned destination in Texas.  In truth, the only reason we went there was because Sharon has this idea that all places that start with "San" are great places.  We honestly knew nothing else about it and I didn't have the heart to shatter her illusion by describing San Antonio's namesake in Ibiza to her!  Besides, when you're "free range" like we are at the moment, you can decide to go to places for random reasons like that if you want to.

In case you haven't heard though, Texas is quite big.  In fact, describing it as "quite big" is sort of like describing Ted Bundy as "a bit naughty".

It took us three days once we crossed the Texas border to reach San Antonio.  Here's an extensive montage of what we saw on the way:

OK good.  Well eventually, the combination of denser traffic, more frequent McDonalds locations and my rising road rage levels told me we were entering a city.  Confident that we hadn't made a wrong turn, since we hadn't in fact had to make any turns that day, it seemed we must be arriving in San Antonio.

We pulled in to an RV resort (gone are the days of slumming it at Walmart - after nearly a year we're all about the luxury!) and hopped straight on a bus into town.

We alighted in downtown and picked up the city's River Walk, a popular tourist attraction purpose-built to encourage economic recovery after the Great Depression.  They basically confined the San Antonio River into a narrow channel which loops around the city centre, paved and landscaped the banks and then garnished them with bars and restaurants.

 

It looks great and provides a welcoming, relaxed atmosphere.  You can catch a water taxi if you wish, or just stroll the pedestrianised banks.

I do question the wisdom though of putting so many bars in such close proximity to so much running water.  What happens when someone inevitably has a call of nature as they stagger home one night?

Fortunately, for now it was just my ever-demanding stomach that was calling.  We ate at a nice Mexican place on the edge of Hemisfair Park and after some food and a cheeky afternoon Margarita, wandered over to check out the park.

Another popular attraction,  Hemisfair Park was originally built to hold the 1968 World's Fair.  Here we found that the city's fascination with water doesn't drain away at the River Walk, with a labyrinth of cascading waterfalls being a prominent feature of the park.

 

It's also the site of the San Antonio skyline's most striking landmark, the 750 ft tall Tower Of The Americas.  Obviously, you can go into and up the tower, where you'll find various shops, restaurants and an observation deck.  We opted to come back another evening for some nighttime views.

The next morning we headed for the west of the city to check out El Mercado / Market Square.  It's a historic shopping district and the largest Mexican shopping centre in the city.  It boasts a "farmer's market", which made us imagine rows of interesting food stalls, but it's more of a crafts and clothes type market.

There's a food court which doubles as an arena for live performances (festivals, fiestas, dance troupes, etc) on certain days of the month.  It was a relatively quiet mid-week day when we visited, so we ate up and headed south towards the King William Historic District.

The King William Historic District is an idyllic neighbourhood of grandiose houses, many developed in the early 1800s and uniquely designed in a variety of different architectural styles.  We spent a good hour just wandering around, gawping at these mansions, some of which probably covered more floor area than every house I've ever lived in put together.

 

Sharon of course ear-marked several for future purchase.  When I sensed that my creative excuses about the terrible termite problems those old wooden frames must experience were wearing thin, I did my best to lead us back up the river towards downtown!

Next on our itinerary was The Alamo.  Now regarded as a symbol of Texan freedom, the Alamo was a mission, converted into a crucial fortification, that was defended against a Mexican siege in 1836 during Texas' war for independence from Mexico.

Texan volunteer soldiers, including famous frontiersman Davy Crockett, held out for 13 days and survived two attempts before the Mexican invaders overpowered them on the third.

The battle struck a chord with many Texans, who joined the struggle and got revenge later that year at the battle of San Jacinto.  "Remember the Alamo!" was their battle cry as they emerged victorious, ensuring Texan independence from Mexico.

We had fully intended to pay for a tour inside the gates of the Alamo, but unfortunately we succumbed to our own battle of wills on the way, failing to walk past the various "Happy Hour!" signs outside the bars along the river.  By the time we eventually wobbled our way to the gates, tours were done for the day so we simply admired from the outside.

 

We then meandered our way back to Hemisfair Park to appreciate nocturnal San Antonio from the top of the tower (and also to catch the last minutes of happy hour).

A stroll back along the river completed our trip the same way it started.  We came to San Antonio with no expectations whatsoever and were pleasantly surprised by everything we found, from its picturesque water features to its grand architecture and buzzing nightlife.

Next we would head north and cross off another "must-see":  A genuine, all-American rodeo!

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